How many people can you fit on one motorcycle?

The answer at the end of the blog. So keep reading. HAH.

So I didn’t realize how many people actually read this blog of mine (PS I hate the word blog, kind of as much as I hate the word pustule. Or moist. Eeeewww), until I recently started receiving fanmail. Ok it was g-chats, some from family, but whatever, I’m not getting an ego. Now when again is Hopkins going to dedicate the school of public health in my name? ok again, I digress- although I project 2020.

A couple of you asked what my working environment is like/coworkers etc. WELL let me tell you- My day starts at about 9 and we stay in the ‘office’ till noon, then head out on to the field for whatever project we are working on. It’s about 10 of us, 1 computer, 5 chairs. Now you ask, “Hey Apoorva, where do you sit? Oh and where do you keep your lunch (that my mommy makes in the morning, hehe).” I sit my ass down on any available chair (I’m still painfully punctual), much to the remorse of my hairy, fat, I-hate-life-because-nobody-even-online-wants-to-marry-me coworker. She loudly suggested the other day that we should put “name stickers” on chairs for those who have been here for a while, so that no one steals chairs. Now listen love, maybe standing up, or heaven forbid- walking around instead of wheeling your damn chair around wouldn’t be such a miserable idea. And while you’re at it, get yourself waxed/threaded sometime. Maaaaaaybe then someone will marry you. NOTE: I am for sure going to hell for this tirade, but whatever, I knew that already. Oh, and see you all there.

My coworkers however, are harmless. They are straight up from the village, dress in salwar-kameezes, speak maybe one ounce of English, have probably never seen a big city even in India (I‘m not kidding), have happy (?) arranged marriages, and children around the ages of 2-5. I can’t really relate to them on those levels, but I am learning that self-deprecating humor is universal, and they are taking to me for that reason. One of them even made me a special lunch item because mentioned it in passing (how she already knew that the way to my heart is through my stomach, I don’t know). I am being unfair however, there are a couple people that have taken to my charms/awkwardness. So what if one of them has a shamelessly lazy eye that I catch myself staring at alllll the time? I don’t judge. One day however, when we were leaving for meetings, one called me out on carrying around a backpack on BOTH shoulders (GAH, how DARE I!?) and high-fived another friend. I’m so not the cool kid at work.

Enough foolishness (or foolywangocity), let me tell you about the project that I decided to do for the month that I am at NARI. My mentor/boss told me that she wanted me to think of something that I can work on so that I have something to show when I’m done with my stint at the Institute. So I came up a questionnaire/interview that I will be conducting with HIV+ individuals to test the psychosocial impact on their affected and/or infected children. I won’t get in to the details of my study here (you can ask if you are interested), but it is going really well. All this week I had to come up with this survey/hypothesis/same population etc so I had a lot of research to do (the only other study of this kind was done in Malawi) since this is my brainchild and am working all alone. One of my first patients today came with her kid- and the little one’s name was Sakshee! I almost died and told her I have a friend named Sakshee. The precocious little one smiled at me and said she also knows an Apoorva. But he’s a boy. OK good, even little children give me grief on the daily. Damn my parents!

PS: I am really distracted right now because I’m watching a banger of a Cricket match, so I’m going to end this soon. On another foolish note, I have taken to observing what bumper stickers people have on their cars. These are not just ANY bumper stickers however, they are PAINTED on to the back of their windshields (some are statements, some are pictures). My favorite one of the day was a picture of a cricket ball and broken glass (as if it was crashing into the car, pure genius). My other favorite one was one that said “Heaven was full, so I came back.” what the fuuuuck, Guajarati people should NOT be allowed to own/operate/embellish vehicles. It is also raining outside my window, and I need to reiterate how much I love the smell of rain/soil/grass. Deelish.

And the answer to the initial question I posed is 6! Wish I had a camera for this moment, I need to start carrying one around my neck at all times like a Japanese tourist to document foolishness. LOVE YOU ALL LIKE I LOVE DOUBLE STUFFED DOUBLE MINT OREOS!!! (haha Truly)

PS: Uplifting news, and basically my dream job at the UNCF: http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/6992401.stm