Wednesday, October 31, 2007

God of Small Things

As I was sitting at my desk doing work, I suddenly got a fantastic whiff of my favorite smell in the whole world (no, I don’t mean Indian man B.O). Rain! The monsoons are over and the hottest month of the year is coming to a halt (trust me, you never want to experience ‘October Heat’), so this anomalous rain is like a muse for me and triggered my need to write! Some of my most cherished childhood memories in India include getting drenched in the rain, standing on Marine Drive (in Bombay) overlooking the Arabian Sea and squealing as I got hit in both directions by the crashing waves as well as thunderous rain, and generally acting a fool. Now when it rains, I think it’s safe to say we all run to find shelter in the absence of umbrellas in case our hair might frizz (girls (and guys)- I KNOW!), or clothes get wet and see-through, we catch a cold etc. (i.e: Most recently when we ran like fools after getting our hurr did for Shiv’s wedding). Next time it rains, I promise to do a Bollywood-esque rain dance. In a white sari.

PS- i also felt the need to write about heat to rub that fact in as i know you all are freezing your little tushies off :D (or big tushies, whatever i am not going to name names).

Speaking of Bombay, since my last trip there, I have been overwhelmed with the ‘smallness’ of things around me. Some things in mini sizes and quantities are great- puppies, travel accessories, my aunt’s ‘milkshake’ (don’t ask), dresses, shots. Some things in mini sizes are just annoying- loofahs, people (read: midgets and girls in clubs), small food portions when you are hungry and then you order three of them and the waiter looks at you like you are crazy and is making a mental note to ask the chef to at least use ‘I cant believe its not butter’- well you know what, sometimes, a girl GOTTA EAT!!! Sorry. Where was I? Ah yes, small things.

All these things are at least acceptable, but when EVERYTHING around you is tiny, you start to feel like Gulliver. I slept over at my cousin’s place the other day, and the bed was as tall as my knees. Now I am no Amazon woman by any means (that would be Truly Tyler- hehe love you), so this was baffling. My coffee was in a mug comparable to the size my dolls used to entertain their tea party guests with. Bananas are about the size of my thumb (at least I have freakishly long fingers). Even stairs are smaller in size I swear, which leads to there being more of them. All this leads me to believe that I either need to lay off the meth, have become too accustomed to the genetic engineering of fruit, or that these sizes have evolved to accommodate the smaller sizes that Indians come in and hence their appetites and appliances. Even at my own home, I have to lean very low to brush my teeth in the sink, heat something on the stove etc- it’s all just built for those of a smaller build I suppose, which leaves me to needing a chiropractor at age 22.

I conclude hearkening back to my ‘foolywang’ post and would like to add a couple things/phenomenas if you will that I have observed lately that make me question so much yet love everything that is India:

  1. Men holding hands with other men without being gay in the least bit. Let me ask the men reading this blog- would you walk around town holding hands with your buddy? Like I mean intimate hand holding- fingers intertwined and such. As Lil Wayne says, ‘no homo’. My brother and I have always had a great time pointing this business out to my mother who laughingly reprimanded us and vehemently supported their apparent ‘innocent friendship’. Now I am not suggesting that the entire male population of India is secretly gay, but homosexuality in India warrants its own post.
  2. This is my new favorite thing to watch for as I am in the car- In Pune, most people commute on motorcycles. Some nice friends on these motorcycles decide to help conserve their bicycling friends’ energy by giving them a ride. How it works is that some champ on a bicycle has one hand on his handlebar, and the other on his motorcycle friends’ shoulder and doesn’t pedal- he just uses his friends momentum to ride along. Priceless.

    Maybe these guys just really want to hold hands but cant since they are on the move? Who knows, I tried getting pictures of this many times but alas, those blighters are too fast for me.

    On that note, I am off- Happy Halloween everyone!!!! Hope you enjoyed my painstakngly festive colors :) How I miss Halloween at Fells Point, Theta parties and watching Chelsea carve pumpkins!!!

One love.

4 comments:

devon said...

Glad to see the return of the term "foolywang". Your observation leads me to a question of my own.

Do Indian males in America also follow this same custom?

Second, please let me know when you will be hosting your rain dance. I will take a solo performance or if your aunt was so inclined to join in I am sure spectators like me would enjoy a good old fashioned family dance off......

Unknown said...

I love that you’re updating your blog more frequently now. I miss you. I feel like I'm repeating myself, but it's true! P.S. Miles says hi.

Apoorva said...

Just to clarify- i didn't mean milkshake like how kelis did. i meant milkshake in the frothy diabetic substance.

Lord help us if i was talking about the former.

Stephen Spencer said...

Fells was fun, and ridiculous as always.

Miss you!